infinity

The other day I dreamed that I made a flagstone infinity sign connecting our two small apple trees. Who am I to question important messages that come through the dream state? I went out and did it.

Maybe I should meditate right there in the center.

saul david raye

Saul David Raye led an afternoon of yoga, and an evening of kirtan with Ram Dass and at Studio Maui in Haiku. He suggested kneeling to touch the Earth and to connect our hearts with the heart of Mother Earth. It reminded me of a gathering of friends where Laura suggested that because Amanda had hooked her light to Divine Light, she was eternal and invincible, and when Saul spoke these words about Gaia, EVERYTHING felt connected in Radiance.

That was late October, and this holiday season has been an ever expanding understanding of the Divinity of all creation. I had the beautiful opportunity to be in the presence of Saul once again from Hawaii via the Cosmic Webstream to celebrate the Winter Solstice, and now I'm between classes as I participate in his virtual New Year's weekend practice from Kauai.

As the holidays have unfolded, I have had family time, connection with our homeless brothers, labyrinth walking time, powerful live music, yoga, and a day of Buddhist practice at Deer Park Monastery. Consistently, the message is to keep opening up my idea of God, of Holiness, and to always dwell in Divine Light.

giving birth to a dancing star

One must have chaos in oneself in order
to give birth to a dancing star.
[Friedrich Nietzsche]

Learning permaculture protocols for designing human settlements is broad and all-encompassing, and simple as well. I'm unlearning a lot of my old favorite gardening techniques that have created visual peace and order, and embracing more natural patterns and techniques that actually open up more productive time and space. It's a new take on Zen.

I haven't even fully unpacked from last weekend in Costa Mesa and have had two more seriously mind-expanding experiences this week.

A circle of nine women traveled out to Lake Henshaw for a day on the Double "J" Ranch on Wednesday. In a gazebo overlooking the lake, surrounded by free ranging horses, goats, chickens and dogs we connected and sent our deepest wishes for harmony with the natural world, for clear energy, and for open hearts. We trekked through the woods for a shared lunch under the oaks, and walked the perimeter of the nine-pointed Earth Star labyrinth. The silence and beauty at the base of Palomar Mountain is powerful, and the silence and beauty within each of my Sophia Sisters is positively glowing! Many thanks to Amanda and to our guide Jana, for facilitating the birth of dancing stars.

Yesterday I journeyed to the Tijuana Estuary in Imperial Beach via lovely Coronado Island to hear a talk by UCSD's Teddy Cruz. With the eye of an artist, he had a wonderful way of using provocative headlines and visual images to explore the flows and relationships between San Diego and Tijuana, through the "forensics of urbanism". Walking us along the border fence (with various maps and photos) observing the informal structures of Tijuana, he suggested that Density could be a measure of social exchange or level of collaboration, and that informal energies could be translated into economic value. We could view each parcel (each human settlement) as a small socio-economic system, where Democracy is redefined as the ability and willingness to coexist with others.

What if the border fence makes San Diego the largest gated community in existence? Does this philosophy of separation achieve highest good?

japanese moment

With dewdrops dripping
I wish somehow I could wash
this perishing world

[Basho]

Today this haiku from Basho moved me. It seems that working with the soil, growing a beautiful Japanese eggplant is a way to "wash this perishing world." A concrete action to reconnect and to cultivate a caring mind. Shining purple blossom with proud yellow center, dark stems against lush green... even before the fruit arrives, it is a wonder to behold.

the Zen of acting

Ben Kingsley was interviewed in the newspaper this week about his upcoming role in the Scorsese film "Shutter Island" and talked about how every detail of his character’s costuming is important, because if he looks down at his own shoes (even if they’re never seen by the audience) and they’re not appropriate to the character, or period, or conditions, his performance would suffer. It is an enormous investment to think through all the personal choices his character would make, but through the process, I absolutely understand that he comes to know his character, to become intimate with him, and we all benefit from the richness of his investment. He says that before every take he goes “to zero. Then I’m ready to receive all the energy of the set, the lighting, especially completely open to the other actors, uncluttered, no preconceptions, know my dialogue backwards. I find that a very gratifying and joyful way to work.” Man, I love him for saying that! Is there any better way to be in the world?

How's your manifesting?

I was new to Southern California when this question was posed by my chiropractor. It seemed kind of weird, very So Cal, maybe a little woo-woo for me...

But then things began to manifest...or I should say I started noticing that my "manifesting" was actually humming right along.

I read an article about bicycle safety that said you should always cover your eyes for riding, using clear goggles at night, to protect from rocks that can shoot out from under a car tire in motion. Good advice. I pictured the goggles I wanted, and they appeared within a couple of days, left behind by a construction crew in the neighborhood.

I carried around an extra 50 pounds for about 10 years, but I kept my driver's license weight at a number that I thought was as high as my scale should ever be. Once my life came back into balance, my weight hit that very number and stuck. It stays right there, on the money.

And this New Year, I focused on two things: writing more and creating two new client relationships. The new clients appeared, and I'm being asked to write more and more, both professionally and in the acting class I'm taking.

There are two excellent Zen teachers in PB. I admire their writing and their energy, but their practice center is out of my cycling comfort zone. One of these gifted teachers has started leading meditation every Wednesday, right down the street. I'm showing up as often as I can.

I was very clear with the hospice organization I volunteer with, that I'd like to work with someone in my own zip code, so I can cycle to my appointments. That person appeared yesterday.

So it's like that. I've started trusting that I can create my own reality. It's very concrete and not as "out there" as I once thought. I'm really grateful.

How's your manifesting?

Lucky Four

You know when people ask you to pick a number between one and whatever? I've always picked four. Honestly, as long as I can remember, I've always chosen four, or fourteen, or twenty-four. I'm one of four children in my family. The first and only move in my young life was at age four. The year I moved to San Diego I turned 44 (my husband was 55, and my mother-in-law 88...a bit of numerological synchronicity to consider another day) and it was one of the most blessed years of my life.

I was able to bring my job with me and work remotely for the first three years. I got married, enjoyed being a honeymooner, luxuriated in the sun and surf, and generally lived in gratitude for all the good food, and the love and support I have in this new place. But in many ways, I've been a tourist.

In April [the fourth month!], I'll begin my fourth year here and I'm noticing deepening roots and spreading branches. I'm launching house and garden projects to feather my nest, building spaces to nurture my creativity. I'm meditating and practicing yoga more often. We have a new website that wants to expand, and I started this blog...it's calling to the writer in me every day.

Year four is going to be excellent.

Good energy is rising

I've been meaning to do some research on the meaning of that gorgeous full blue moon that arrived on New Year's Eve. We stepped outside to share a fresh tangerine from the tree, and to marvel over how lit-up the whole world was that night! Some great photos have been posted here.

In my little corner of the world, the Sophia Circle is gathering this week to generate some beautiful feminine energy, and interesting new projects are arriving on my doorstep. I'm have to really meditate to stay grounded, it's all so energizing!

House Blessing

Don't you love the idea of blessing a place? I try to hold that intention for every room I enter, and sometimes for retail stores too, if my head is in the right place. I breathe deeply and send my wish for the space and the people in it to be filled with the energy of love, lightness, and creativity.

I picked up a mosaic "house charm" at the Seattle Flower and Garden Show about 10 years ago. The artist painted and fired the tiles herself, then strategically broke them to be reset into this richly colored design. I'm moved by the power of her intention. She knew just what colors and images (lively asparagus and a beautiful tulip) would be perfect for blessing a gardener's home. The handwritten tag says: Hang in an entryway, kitchen, bathroom... anywhere you want to bless or greet.

And now the house charm is blessing this space in the blogosphere. I'm glad you dropped by. Please visit often in the coming year and I'll try to share fresh ideas every few days.

Lovingkindness

A tiny cosmos flower opened its petals this Christmas morning, next to the brussels sprouts, spinach and emerging red kale. With it's return to the garden I feel a sense of renewal and well being. Spanish priests grew cosmos in their mission gardens in Mexico. The evenly placed petals led them to christen the flower "Cosmos" the Greek word for harmony or ordered universe.


May I be peaceful, happy and light, in body and in spirit.
May you be peaceful, happy and light, in body and in spirit.
May all beings everywhere be peaceful, happy and light, in body and in spirit.

it's all art

I've been thinking lately about the importance of art and how many pathways there are for authentic personal expression.

Something from Buddhadharma's winter issue, attributed to Dogen and expanded through commentary, says this:

"We should reflect on our one-sided way of seeing and investigate ways of expanding our vision and experience of the world around us. [...] A good portion of Western art produced over the last thousand years is overtly religious in content. It expresses the artist's sense of the divine. It is, in fact, possible to say that all serious art is, in some sense, an attempt to articulate the ineffable. Taking this further, we can say that everything we do is part of that artistic expression. Liturgy is artistic expression. Oryoki [Japanese Zen ceremony], the formal taking of a meal, is artistic expression."

My friend Sharon often says that dancing, healing arts, and creative arts are all part of the same flow. I have to agree. When we live mindfully and with intention, everything we do can be an expression of our divine nature.